What does it do?
by Age of the Geek
Summary: An Hardison/Parker fic centering on the plant Alec suggested the group buy. Will take place after every assignment. This story deals with the Bank Shot Job


Parker stared at the plant and liked the way the sun shone on it during the afternoons. She hated to leave it but a young girl had died and the family needed justice. She just hoped it survived the road trip.

Hardison hated being away from his apartment. Hated being away from cool central air unit but most of all, he hated being away from his babies and the high speed internet access. 14 days of no orange soda and he was snapping at everybody, including Parker. Yet, she was a trooper as he continued his ranting and raving...until he mentioned the illegal downloading of his new passion: Dr. Who. He could not tell if she was joking but did not want to risk Parker's wrath. Even after she lit a basket of papers on fire, turning the already hot van into a furnace, he decided to check in with Elliot instead of starting a fight. He was a few hours away from lounging in his recliner, drinking orange soda, and watching the aforementioned Dr. Who. He appreciated the new companion but the last one, Martha, was a babe. He wished Nate would hurry up so he could put this Podunk town in the rearview mirror.. When Hardison saw him at the door, he was ready to put the key in the ignition but Nate did not move. Hardison was sweating and Geeks did not like to sweat. He swore under his breath as Nate spoke over the earpiece. He could not believe his bad luck that a bank robbery had occurred when they were minutes away from a clean getaway but then Parker made him realize he was quite fortunate. He had forgotten Sophie was also in the bank. The plan called for her to leave on break or during lunch. He had no intention of leaving no one behind but he did not think well in the heat. He hoped Parker would understand that. In fact, when they "appropriated" the car, he explained what happened:

Hardison: Listen, my bad about Sophie. I would never leave anyone behind. Just not thinking staight. This heat is killing me

Parker: Get your head in the game! We have to save Nate and Sophie!!

The thief did not mean to bark but she was frustrated as well. She was worried about her teammates but her plant as well. She did not know how much longer it would last:

Hardison: I got some people to check on the offices and water the plants. Worse thing to come home to is dead plants.

Parker smiled broadly but Hardison did not see as he was paying attention to the road. Once again it appeared as if Alec had read her mind. It would be creepy if he wasn't so sweet. Now she was angry at the bank robbers for putting her friends in danger, unnecessary danger to boot. If you are going to do a job, take some pride in it, she muttered as Alec pulled into the parking lot for their meeting with Elliot:

Hardison: What did you say?

Parker then talked in great detail about robbing banks and Alec was impressed. Although he was stressed about Nate and Sophie, he was relieved that Parker had forgiven him about Sophie. Now he could focus on the mission at hand. For an unplanned heist, things were going smoothly until Nate decided to help another family with money already allocated. Hardison could believe his ears and neither could Parker. She jumped by his side as the pair listened to the boss' plan. Parker had an idea what Nate was thinking but had to think of a way in. She then came up on the idea of the payment drop chute. What surprised her was that Hardison knew why they would be a good access point. She could not help but stare and wonder what Alec Hardison did not know. He made some smart comment which read her mind again. Parker would not give Hardison the satisfaction of knowing he was right. Parker was also amazed when Alec came up witha plan to distract the police. He was no longer thinking about other things. Hardison was now in his element as he kept the police attention while Parker worked her way into the bank. Seems like was living in vents lately. These were not long though and she ended up waiting and thinking. Hardison was first and foremost. She could not think of the gang without Nate but Hardison was proving to be quite the capable substitute. The father arrived and Parker realized not only were her friends in jeopardy but a wife as well. She thought to herself this is why she worked alone. With no one to depend on her but she also liked the camaraderie that had quickly developed with the band of thieves. As Parker climbed out, she decided she would not change a thing would do anything to make sure everyone got out safe and sound.

Just when the situation could not get any worse, shots were fired. Parker was shaken but Hardison played it off. He wondered why Parker was jolted by the gunplay. They were the bad guys yet, rarely used weapons. But Parker had to have gun shots before. Alec wanted to know more except time wasn't on his side and he needed to see what is going on. Then, Hardison saw that Nate was hurt, he was concerned as well. They needed the cash back and in a hurry but they needed an exit strategy. Although Nate had been injured, Hardison had no doubt Nate would come up with plot to extract him and Sophie. Boss Hogg had other ideas and figured out the scheme, including his state-of-the-art earpieces. Parker came over and Alec was glad for the company, especially when the Judge crushed the second device. The guilt Hardison felt earlier began to creep back in. It was not his fault but he felt the added pressure. The parents were in a bad place and now it was up to the kids to act. Hardison wanted Boss Hogg to pay for hurting Ford and losing money was not enough. "What is the worst thing you can do a corrupt Judge", he murmured to himself. Parker asked what he said but the hacker ignored her and went to work.

Parker was annoyed that Hardison did not respond but continued to work on the laptop. Yet, Alec had been a rock since they donned their FBI persona. She hated the waiting and sitting around doing nothing. Elliot was dealing the crank crew and Hardison was banging away on the keyboard. Nate was bleeding badly but Sophie was tending to the wound and was at least being helpful. She barked at the police to do something but they already were. Parker then began to reign herself in. The pizza arrived shortly after and Parker attempted to light a fire under him.

Hardison barely heard Parker tell him about the pizzas as he finished up on the computer and formulated the rest of the strategy in his head. Sometimes ADD was a good thing he thought.. Alec's habit of making all things looking technological look easy worked against him this time. Video editing was never easy but on a laptop in the middle of a bank robbery tested even his skills. He also wanted the video to hold up in court. There was no way Boss Hogg would get off because he was sloppy Alec nearly jumped out of his shin though when Elliot shook his arm and asked if this was the right time to play video games. Hardison gave a fake laugh and turned to both and describe how they would get their colleagues out:

Elliot: I thought we lost contact with Nate and Sophie?

Parker: We did.

Elliot: Who came up with this?

Hardison: I did.

Elliot: No, really. This might actually work.

Before Hardison could come up with a snappy reply, Parker reminded the pair Nate was bleeding. The guys shook hands and went about their business. Hardison took a deep breath and knocked on the bank door.

The plan was executed flawlessly, including Parker sneaking back into the bank beforehand to leave the suitcase on the floor with the goodies. Alec used the distraction to push the pizza box off the counter and out of sight. The only complications were using Parker since the Sheriff and his men could recognize her and the rest of the hostages. He hated being right as Boss Hogg ran up to Parker and Elliot as they tried to leave but her back stayed to the lawmen and they were none the wiser. The other hindrance was cleaned up by the fact the judge was such an ass that the entire town hated him. Hardison took great pride in watching him unravel and delivering the coup de gras himself, all at the insistence of the judge. When the video played, he knew the judge was done. Sophie came over and reminded him he was still a geek. He knew she meant no harm and liked the way she said it with that sultry British accent. Alec used banter to play off the fact he had forgotten about her earlier and wanted say he was sorry but thought against it. She and Nate were free and that was all that mattered.

The ambulance ride was uneventful, except for Nate trying to micromanage during his minor surgery. Sophie complimented Parker on her performance. She tried to play it off as nothing but Parker was beaming on the inside. She appreciated that not only people depended on her but genuinely thought she did a great job. It had been a short time since she joined this rag-tag team but she felt comfortable for the first time in years.

Hardison felt a great deal of relief as he drove the group to the airport. It was fun to hear them rib Nate about being used to being shot, especially since it was Sophie who did the deed the first time. Parker had done a great job back there, even Elliot came back with the money and the mother. He felt he deserved his orange soda and broadband internet but then Nate made a comment about the pizza boxes. He just knew Nate was going to come up with a dozen of better plans but when he didn't, Alec felt even better. He even thought about driving home in the ambulance.

Parker rushed to her office before going home to make sure her plant was safe and sound. It looked like she had left it. Parker went to the fridge and got some bottled water. As she poured the water on the leaves and in the dirt, she started to talk about the last assignment. She took great pleasure in the fact that she reminded Hardison about Sophie and she was able to help 3 families, including her own:

Parker: You better not tell anyone I said that.

She held the water up as a threat not to give it anymore if it spilled her secrets:

Parker: He did it again. Hardison not only read my mind but he was able to impress me not once but twice. He has knowledge of old-fashioned bank chutes. How does he have all this information? He was an ass in the beginning though, being a big baby and wanting to leave Sophie behind. Yet, when lives were on the line, he took charge and got everyone out. He is very good but he knows it. I like working him though. He listens to me and I learn from him as well.

Parker gently stroked a leaf for a few minutes in silence as she tried to figure out Alec Hardison and why they connected. The knock on the door startled her as she thought everyone had left. She moved away from the plant as she told the person to enter:

Hardison: We got some popcorn and orange soda. Nate is going to tell us how Sophie shot him, from the beginning. You in?

Parker nodded and Hardison left. Before she joined the group, Parker held her index finger to her lips and pointed to the plant. She had faith it would keep quiet. Now, she just had to come up with a name but that could wait.


End file.
